Mart's Desk

I rewarded myself for weeks of hard work clearing out my mother’s house and getting it ready to sell with some time to do just what I wanted to do. My husband warned, “You’ll just work the whole time.” He knows me so well! I’m one of those people who gets a rush by getting things done. And, I enjoy my work and value keeping my life organized and staying on top of the many things I must do to maintain my home, maintain and grow my business, stay healthy, maintain good relationships, be productive, and help my mother. So, yes, I work a lot!

What did I do with my “free” time? Instead of plopping down in front of Dancing With the Stars or a good book, I set up a newly acquired writing desk that I had brought home when I cleared Mom’s house. It is a beautiful treasure that once belonged to Mart, my father’s mother. What began as an idea to move some supplies for writing notes to friends and family resulted in my clearing out and reorganizing two drawers in my office desk plus one supply drawer of pens and pencils. All it took was getting started on one drawer and my project blossomed. Why? Because all the items related to writing notes were in three locations. Once I got into each location to pull out items to put in Mart’s desk I realized that the whole drawer needed an overhaul.

Why am I telling you this? Because it’s the kind of thing that happens when you begin rearranging things in your space. Now, I could have pulled out what I wanted to put in Mart’s desk and left a jumble behind in all three places. Instead I seized the opportunity and the energy I felt to clear out and create a new order. All three drawers are now uncluttered and so much more functional. It will now be a breeze to locate items that I need within seconds. And, in the process I got rid of things that no longer serve my current needs. I’m not fighting with ugly greeting cards or struggling with an overwhelming quantity of seasonal cards I would have never used.

I also could have started that project and quit halfway through, because it did require making a lot of decisions. What kept me going? The knowledge that I was making space for new, good things to come to me. The belief that lightening my physical load would give me relief in my daily functioning. And, I knew I could create spaces that felt better than they did when I started. I kept telling myself, “Out with the dead stuff!”

Now my little writing desk is ready for use. I’ve already retrieved some rubber bands from it, and was glad to have had that supply close at hand. The order that greets me when I open my desk drawer gives me a sense of well-being. You too can achieve these benefits! Start with believing it is possible, and then make it happen–even if you have to get help to make it so. Many people have brains that cannot do what I did last night. It’s not a character flaw. It’s just a fact. Get help and get clear! You too can achieve a sense of well-being by clearing out and creating a new order.

Oh, and did I work all evening long? Well, not the whole evening. I did take a break to eat and watch Dancing With the Stars before I sorted my pens and pencils and checked them out to see what worked and what didn’t. . . .

Mom and brother Mark overlooking the water view from Mom's house.

I’m gearing up to clear out my mother’s house. My mom is adjusting well to her new home in Gayton Terrace, an assisted living facility near me in Richmond, VA. Now it’s time to take the next step, clear out Mom’s home in Kilmarnock, VA and get it ready to sell. It will be a big job, but I’m so lucky that my mom and her husband had only been living there for about 13 years and both regularly got rid of things. They were neat nicks and great purgers. Compared to what many people face when their parents leave their homes, this job will be a breeze–on the physical level.

What has surprised me are the waves of sadness I’ve experienced since I made the decision that it’s time to begin the big clean out. It wasn’t my family home. Yes, I’d had many nice visits there with Mom and John, and this last year with just Mom since John’s death last January. It’s a lovely home on the water. But the sadness has more to do with dismantling the physical remains of two lives that had been intertwined for 27 years. Mom and John had a deep love that begin in high school and reignited in their late 50s. They loved their life together and they loved their home.

Mom and John carefully tended their home, kept it neat, clean and organized. On one level–the physical level– that will make my job easier, but no less difficult on another–the emotional level. How will I do it? I will work hard to remember that what I’m doing will benefit my mother who needs to close this chapter of her life to be fully present to her new life in Richmond. I’ll keep in mind that Mom will also benefit from the funds generated from the sale of her home. I will also remember that I will benefit because I currently carry all the responsibility for the safety of the home, a home that is a 90 minute drive from my home. I need to have this chapter closed to better be able to focus on Mom and her needs and to have greater peace of mind.

But, it’s still sad. I will allow the sadness and enjoy the memories that emerge while I work to respectfully close the door on this chapter of my mother’s life.

I’m sure Starbucks is probably not thrilled that I use their stores as an extension of my office, filling a seat for hours at a time and buying just one drink. But, that’s what I do between clients, especially when it’s too hot or too cold to hang out in my car and too far from home or too short a time to make a return trip to my home office worthwhile.

Ever since Starbucks started offering free Wi-Fi I’ve been making Starbucks my coffee shop of choice. In the process I’ve visited a majority of the Starbucks in the Richmond area. Believe it or not, the feng shui of all Starbucks in NOT the same! I have my favorites and I’ve identified those where I just cannot work.

Recently I thought I’d try a new Starbucks in the Short Pump Town Center in Glen Allen, VA. I immediately noticed that the space was very small, not enough room to feel comfortable hanging out. And, the light was very dim. At first I thought the lighting must be different than in other stores, but then I noticed that the store was set back under an overhang that blocked natural light. And, it had windows on just one side of the store.

The stores that “feel” the best are places where I get the most productive work done. They have the best light, usually on at least two sides of the store. And, they have enough space to feel like a gathering space instead of a hit and run caffeine source, with a footprint that is more square than rectangular. Another factor is the clientele. I avoid one store because it is a drop spot for homeless people who ask for money.

If you too are a solopreneur who needs a temporary place to work out of the weather and enjoy Starbucks Wi-Fi and Starbucks coffee, chose a store with the best feng shui. Comfort matters! Comfort positively correlates with productivity.

As I drove out to Kilmarnock, Virginia, to visit my Mom recently, I found myself feeling such joy. I was being fed with Peter, Paul and Mary on Pandora internet radio, the beauty of lush, green farmland, and gratitude for my comfortable home and solid marriage. Everything is alive with energy, and I was able to access positive energies from all those sources.

What made it possible for me to drink in the positive in my life? I had cleared some significant clutter the week before.

• I went to court for a speeding ticket I got while singing along to Pandora on a previous trip to Mom’s house. I was lucky to come away with the opportunity to go to driving school and keep my driving record clean. After court I immediately found a school and got the class scheduled!
• I’d recorded several videos for The 12 Month Clutter Clearing Community site, clearing some of my own fear and insecurity about speaking in front of a camera.
• My house had been cleaned the day before.
• My assistant had paid my bills, so I was current about our financial status.
• I’d cleared some concern about my father’s well-being by calling him and discovering that his situation had improved since our last call.
• And, I’d cleared at least 30 files!

Those of you who are wondering what alpacas have to do with clutter clearing will want to read my posts on April 24 and May 16 to get the complete story of Julie’s saga from deciding to go for her dream of moving to the mountains to raise alpacas, to selling her house to the second couple who looked at it, to finding a house near Asheville, NC before reading this post.

When I caught up with Julie last week I learned that she was moving full steam ahead with her plans to move to the mountains. Her journey since my last update had a few bumps, like the appraisal on the house she had hoped to buy coming in at $45,000 below the asking price. Despite a few sleepless nights, Julie decided to get out of the contract and look for another home. In her words, “ Things worked out for the best. The other house was really more remote than I wanted to be.” I have a hunch that Julie was able to make good decisions on her behalf because she had no physical clutter to make decision-making more difficult.

The new house that Julie found is within easy reach of Asheville, is on one acre, has a fenced

Indie and Sahara

yard for her three dogs, Sahara, Lili, and Indie, and even has a fenced area behind it that comes with goats! So, Julie can try her hand at raising livestock before she makes a bigger commitment to alpacas or sheep. And, the house is in excellent condition!

As so often happens in life, there have been delays with the closing of the sale of her house and the house in Asheville, but Julie keeps plugging along. When we last talked her movers had packed up her house and she was attending to the final details of leaving her house.

“I’ve had some sleepless nights. I’ve wondered what I was thinking when I contemplated this move, but I’ve never regretted my decision to go for it,” Julie said. “It was all a matter of trust, trusting guidance, trusting you, trusting Nina, trusting my Asheville realtor.

And, is she excited? If she was less tired, she’d probably be flying from the light fixtures! When she told me about the area where she’ll be living and discussed work opportunities, it was clear that she looks forward to exploring the area and all its opportunities. How many people do you know that need to find a job who are excited about figuring out what work to do next? Julie has a quiet confidence that it will all work out. She’s clear that what she’d doing is the right move for her at this point in her life. Her courage and trust are impressive!

And, clutter clearing? Julie continued doing it to the very end of the packing process. She even went through old photos, determined not to take any that were not important to her. She felt such relief and release and had experienced such positive results from the clutter clearing she’d done to help sell the house that she wanted to make sure she did all she could to lighten her load for her journey. I have no doubt that the clearing will continue when she unpacks. She wants no barriers to finding work, friends and new adventures in her new home.

Clearing clutter doesn’t guarantee that doors will open and that you’ll have smooth sailing. But, it does lighten your load, help you get clear about what really matters, and find the energy to move in the direction of your dreams. Julie, a single mother of two grown children, trusted that clutter clearing would help her find her way to fulfilling her dream. And, her dream is coming true. What is your dream? You too can harness the power of clutter clearing to go for it! It starts with a decision–to clear or not to clear. I hope you choose to get clear and soar!

© 2012 Clutter Clearing Community | Debbie Bowie

“Author, Organizing Expert and Feng Shui Practitioner Debbie Bowie, is a leading authority on clutter clearing to attract more of what you want in your life. If you’re ready to finally clear the clutter from your life and move your life forward, get your FREE TIP SHEET, “Feng Shui Tips for Instant Success” at http://www.clutterclearingcommunity.com.

My dream is to take the message “Clear Clutter for Good” worldwide! Clearing clutter for good is not about getting rid of clutter once and for all. After all, clutter clearing is an on-going process, not an event. However, with information and support it is possible to make clutter clearing a positive action 12 months of the year. How would your life be different if you made a conscious effort to clear clutter every single month of the year?

I believe that intentional clutter clearing makes space for good in your life and in our world in three ways.

1. You get more of what you really want in all areas of your life.
2. When you get more of what you really want, you are happier and become a bright light and positive influence in a world that has much darkness.
3. You move static resources back out into the community in the form of donations and recycling.

To accomplish my dream I have established The 12 Month Clutter Clearing Community. It is a membership site devoted to helping people clear clutter for good. This year I am walking members through every area of the house, with clutter clearing advice in the form of blog posts, action plans, daily tips, and video tips.

I will also be telling the stories of three courageous women who have committed to 12 months of intentional clutter clearing with me. You can follow their journeys and find inspiration to tackle your own clutter clearing challenges.

To foster a sense of community and share ideas and resources, I will facilitate a monthly conference call where members can participate in conversations with other members in a community forum and groups of specific interest, and I will be answering specific questions about clutter clearing dilemmas.

How can you help? You can do three things right now:

1. If you are not already a member, join now!
2. Tell 3 of your friends/family members about the Community and ask them to join so you can support each other in your clutter clearing efforts. Ask them to “pay it forward” and ask 3 of their family/friends to join the Community.
3. Start your own clearing project for just 15 minutes per day, notice how your life changes for good, and tell others about what clutter clearing has done for you.

Thanks for your help to share my message: Clear Clutter for Good!

© 2012 Clutter Clearing Community | Debbie Bowie

“Author, Organizing Expert and Feng Shui Practitioner Debbie Bowie, is a leading authority on clutter clearing to attract more of what you want in your life. If you’re ready to finally clear the clutter from your life and move your life forward, get your FREE TIP SHEET, “Feng Shui Tips for Instant Success” at http://www.clutterclearingcommunity.com.

Those of you who read my previous post entitled “Clear Clutter to Get Your Dream–Alpacas Here We Come!” may be wondering what happened to Julie, my client who intentionally cleared her whole house to go for her dream of living in the mountains and raising alpacas. Once the hurdle of selling her house had been handled, she set her intention on finding the right new home for the next leg of her journey. I was so excited when I got a call from her with news that she’s found that home. It’s just 20 minutes north of Asheville, NC, in a small community named Mars Hill. The house is the perfect size for her, is set into a lovely landscape, has been lovingly and meticulously maintained by its current owner, and she’s set to close on the house on June 4. The sale of her house will be final on June 14.

What’s interesting is that the current owner of Julie’s new house is an energy worker. I have always suspected that Julie is an energy worker in preparation. She is fascinated by Reiki , healing touch, feng shui, etc. So, the predecessor chi (energy left by previous owners) of the house is a good match for Julie!

Not only has Julie gotten a full price offer on her home, negotiated an acceptable contract for a lovely new home, but everything else seems to be falling into place. She had a camper and shed down at Sandbridge that she needed to sell. On a recent trip to the beach she easily sold both. All the arrangements associated with the move are being handled with relative ease!

Julie's New Home

Remember, Julie has been orchestrating this move by herself. She is a single mom of grown children pursuing a dream. How often do you hear of middle aged single women pulling up roots and setting off on an adventure? Not very often! I’m so impressed with Julie’s courage and determination! And, I’m impressed with what can happen when you get clear about what you really want! Julie got clear mentally, then got clear physically–by clearing her home of all items that she no longer loved and used. In so doing, she removed energetic boundaries that could have impeded her progress to follow her dream.

Julie’s journey still continues. I can’t wait to see where it will lead her. To her credit, she has managed to keep her fear of the unknown in check and take the necessary steps to keep moving forward. What is your heart’s desire? What do you really want, but feel unable to attain? If you don’t know what you want, or if you do, but can’t see a way to go for it, start by clearing clutter. Clear the energetic barriers that block you from having what you really want. Julie has demonstrated that clearing clutter can help make dreams come true!

Our homes are an outward expression of our inner selves. And, sometimes they tell the story of imminent change. Let me show you what I mean.

“It just doesn’t feel like my house anymore!” lamented Sally, a client who was in the midst of preparing her house for sale. Sally’s decision to pursue a life dream to buy a farm and raise alpacas necessitated her selling her split-level house, a place that she had made her sanctuary over a period of ten years. At this time when houses are slow to sell, it is especially important that they look almost perfect. Her realtor had advised her to paint the entire house in shades of buttery yellow. Gone was the brilliant blue office and the peaceful blue dining room. “I feel like I’m living in a margarine stick!” she railed.

Sally was also agitated because creating a peaceful, neutral space that a prospective buyer could view without distraction and easily picture himself inhabiting, had required that she move many of her belongings to a storage unit. Preparing her house for sale had also given her the opportunity to sort through her belongings and clear out anything that she no longer needed or loved. She was left in a shell of her former home, a place that she no longer recognized, nor did she feel comfortable inhabiting.

Sally was between selves. She had moved beyond the self who had painted those blue walls and had tolerated a packed attic, to a self who was prepared to make a huge leap of faith, buying a farm and finding a new job in a new location. When she began clearing out her house, sending things to storage, the trash, and a local charity, she was physically ripping up energetic roots that had helped her feel comfortable and grounded. She was adrift in unfamiliar territory. Painting the walls in colors not of her choosing effectively wiped away evidence of her individuality. Everything became neutral. Of course Sally had reason to rail against the injustices of the real estate sales process! She was feeling like a stranger in her own home. She was grieving the loss of her things and already grieving the loss of the home that had been such a comfort to her.

Is this a normal reaction? Absolutely! Preparing a house for sale is a stressful and exhausting process. If, like Sally, your home has been your haven, transforming it into a strange place devoid of evidence of your energy can only be disturbing. At a time of high stress you crave stability and familiar, safe places to retreat. Everywhere Sally looked was upheaval, strangeness and work to be done.

Was making all those changes imperative? Given the current real estate market, and given that Sally’s house has no special features like a water view or new garage, making those changes were the best steps to take to increase the probability of a fast sale.

Is there a way that Sally could have avoided the grief and stripping of her energy from her house? Unfortunately, change often comes with a cost. In Sally’s case, she paid the price by having to strip her home of specific evidence of her existence, leaving her feeling sad and mad and frustrated. To her credit she put words to her anguish, which helped her deal with her mixed feelings. What a healthy response!

Wouldn’t you be troubled if your influence was erased from your home and you found yourself living in a place of your own making that was not an outward reflection of your inner self? And, all those changes also came at great financial cost. They speak volumes about the price Sally was willing to pay to go for her dream!

© 2012 Clutter Clearing Community | Debbie Bowie

“Author, Organizing Expert and Feng Shui Practitioner Debbie Bowie, is a leading authority on clutter clearing to attract more of what you want in your life. If you’re ready to finally clear the clutter from your life and move your life forward, get your FREE TIP SHEET, “Feng Shui Tips for Instant Success” at http://www.clutterclearingcommunity.com.

My client stood in the middle of her home office looking overwhelmed and harried. “What a mess! I don’t know where to start!” How often have you felt that way? Without a word I began clumping like items together. Mary Kay products in one area, cassette tapes and CDs in another area, paper in another area. When I left that day, the room still had way too much in it, but everything was sorted into piles of like items.

Two weeks later I returned and was surprised to learn that my client had not only organized much of her Mary Kay products, but she’d also sorted and filed papers for over two hours. How remarkable! You see, this client had been diagnosed with ADHD. In the 13 years I’ve been helping people clear clutter and get organized, I cannot recall a single client who had spent two hours sorting paper by themselves after one of my visits, much less one with ADHD. ADHD is a brain disorder with deficits in executive functioning that make dealing with paper seem like an impossible nightmare. I was astounded. Paper is one of the toughest things to organize for anyone, and is definitely at the top of the list of organizing tasks that are avoided like the plague!

My client had no clue that what she had accomplished was remarkable. She said, “When the paper was all over the room, I couldn’t even begin to think about going through it. But, once it was all in one place, it was much easier to do.” That is the power of clumping. Once like items are all in one place, it’s much easier to deal with them, both psychologically and energetically. When items are all over the place, it’s as though their energy is calling to you from all different directions. It’s just impossible to wrap your brain around what to do with them. Put them all together and you’re ready for action.

So, the next time you are faced with an overwhelming organizing challenge, first clump like items together. Don’t make decisions about the items you’re clumping, unless it’s a no-brainer to discard them. Making decisions will distract you from clumping and slow the clumping process. Once you have groupings of like items, then go back to each grouping, working from the largest to the smallest items, and make decisions about what to keep, what to pitch and how to containerize items. Experience the power of clumping!

I say the word “attic” when I give a speech, and at least half the audience cringes or groans. Why is that? Perhaps, as is so common, their attics have become toxic dump sites.

As I was helping a client excavate her attic, amidst the boxes of useless stuff covered with pollen, dust and dirt, I found myself pondering attics. I thought, “If people remembered that one day they’d be going through the equivalent of ‘hell’ in order to sell their house, follow their dream, or move to a better living situation, they would be VERY careful about what they put up in attics!” But, alas, most of us live only in the moment when the attic seems an easy answer for storing things you aren’t quite ready to get rid of, or about which you are unable to make decisions.

I hate clearing out attics. Did I say that already? Well, I do. They are most often nasty, dirty places housing items of marginal value. These days it’s rare that I run into an attic that holds really interesting stuff. For example, a recent find by a client who was excavating her attic in preparation for a move was 6 boxes of miscellaneous junk that one of her sons threw into boxes, probably when he’d been ordered to clean his room, and hauled into the attic. The son moved away, but his litter remained. The only redeeming quality of that stuff was that it was quickly pitched into the trash with minimal effort and few tears of nostalgia. My thought was, “Why did it end up there in the first place!”

Here are my suggestions for maintaining an attic as a useful storage area instead of a toxic dump site:

1. Teach all family members that the attic is NOT a place to dump things they don’t want to deal with.
2. Store only items that have a high likelihood of being used again at a later date.
3. Attempt to store only the following categories in the attic: luggage, seasonal decorations, out of season clothing or linens, archived financial documents, furniture and household items that grown children will later use in homes of their own, camping/seasonal recreation equipment. Most other categories of items, like books and memorabilia, do not do well when subjected to the temperature extremes of an attic.
4. Once a year review the contents of the attic, clear out useless items and restore order.

And, remember, feng shui teaches that an attic is the area of your hopes and aspirations. No wonder so few people aren’t achieving their dreams! The area of their hopes and aspirations primarily holds the remains of old dreams and cast off items.

Treat your attic with the respect it deserves, and not only will it be a useful place to store items of real value, but you’ll be more likely to achieve your hopes and aspirations.