“I’m beginning to feel a little nauseous,” said Gloria. She and I were working in her finished attic, pulling bins of old photos and memorabilia out from under the eaves. I paused and wondered what was going on with her. In my experience, both as a recipient of counseling and observing people doing difficult emotional work, nausea can indicate that deep old feelings are attempting to come to the surface. The boxes we were touching held the story of several significant decades of her life, one that included great heartache and the pain of a broken marriage and difficult divorce. Yes, we were physically stirring the emotional waters of her history by accessing those boxes.

Once I told Gloria that I suspected that the nausea was her response to the difficult work we were about to embark on, we got started sorting through the photographs. As I do with all my clients, I started with the biggest, easiest chunks of photos and memorabilia first. Gloria was very ready to release cards from her ex-husband and photos of the two of them. It was time. She understood that holding on to them would only keep the sadness, anger and conflicting feelings in place, blocking her from moving forward to the possibility of having a relationship that could be different, more fun, respectful and life-affirming.

Before I left Gloria I warned her that it was quite possible that she would experience an emotional catharsis following our session because the work we had done had probably stirred up some deep feelings about the loss of her marriage. I encouraged her to allow the grief, to feel whatever came up and to resist the urge to medicate those feelings with food, activity, anything that she typically uses to shut down feelings.

The next time I saw Gloria she told me that she had continued to feel nauseated for several days and had indeed grieved. And, she was happy to report that while she allowed the grief she had had some important insights about her marriage, ones that were helping her move forward.

The next time you feel like you want to run from a clearing project, because of nausea, anxiety, fatigue or any other uncomfortable feeling, be still for a few moments. See if you can identify what is sending you running. If you stop and face it, even for a few moments, you’ll release energies that are holding you back. And, ultimately you’ll reclaim some of your personal power, power that was compromised by the strength of the emotions being held in place by your belongings.

This entry was posted on Sunday, February 7th, 2010 at 2:08 pm and is filed under Clutter Clearing, Letting Go. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.